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Literature Text
It's like eating something after cleaning your teeth. Everything tastes weird and different. Water tastes a bit coarser and grapes are sourer. You see the world in a whole different light; you think a different way. You're not you.
You'd think that after so many time that I would get used to this. Yeah, me too. But if you've ever nearly died then you'll know that the feeling haunts you always. It's the feeling of something being pushed to the back of your mind. You used to wear a stick of celery, but that's just a story now. You used to tweet away on your recorder. The musical instrument has just been collecting dust somewhere in the depths of TARDIS.
Everything about me changes, and I'm not me anymore. I can pretend, but it doesn't feel the same. I may not even like the same people anymore. Maybe I'll fancy a pear sometime soon.
It's the fear. The fear of change and oblivion because I think I'll forget. I'll forget my family, my planet, that burning sky. I'll forget the friends I've made, the worlds I've saved, the people I've loved and the enemies I've tried to redeem.
So I went back to visit them, the recent ones at least. One at a time I stood at a distance, just watching and waiting. The storm was moving in and I didn't have much time.
You know, I almost thought about giving up. The Time Lord lives too long. That's not an opinion. It's a fact. More than 900 years and I'm still just running and wandering.
The TARDIS blazes with a majestic light. The windows shatter. Time catches on fire and even then it feels like dying. Everything that is, was, will ever be me falls away.
And another man saunters off.
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The feeling of death is a little too close for comfort. You'd think that after all the running and all the times I've faced it, all the times I've been willing to sacrifice myself for something, I'd get used to it. But you never will. You never get used to the feeling that your existence will soon cease to be.
But every time I die, he still stays –right there in the depths of my soul. Like an echo. It reverberates in my mind, the last moments, the memories. Like the beat of my hearts. And I know… I know he didn't want to go. Take it whichever way you like, but he didn't want to go. Not to forever death and not to me.
But sometimes we're not given a choice. There will be thirteen of me, but I'm still one person.
One in the same, never to change.
And I sauntered off.
You'd think that after so many time that I would get used to this. Yeah, me too. But if you've ever nearly died then you'll know that the feeling haunts you always. It's the feeling of something being pushed to the back of your mind. You used to wear a stick of celery, but that's just a story now. You used to tweet away on your recorder. The musical instrument has just been collecting dust somewhere in the depths of TARDIS.
Everything about me changes, and I'm not me anymore. I can pretend, but it doesn't feel the same. I may not even like the same people anymore. Maybe I'll fancy a pear sometime soon.
It's the fear. The fear of change and oblivion because I think I'll forget. I'll forget my family, my planet, that burning sky. I'll forget the friends I've made, the worlds I've saved, the people I've loved and the enemies I've tried to redeem.
So I went back to visit them, the recent ones at least. One at a time I stood at a distance, just watching and waiting. The storm was moving in and I didn't have much time.
You know, I almost thought about giving up. The Time Lord lives too long. That's not an opinion. It's a fact. More than 900 years and I'm still just running and wandering.
The TARDIS blazes with a majestic light. The windows shatter. Time catches on fire and even then it feels like dying. Everything that is, was, will ever be me falls away.
And another man saunters off.
------------------------
The feeling of death is a little too close for comfort. You'd think that after all the running and all the times I've faced it, all the times I've been willing to sacrifice myself for something, I'd get used to it. But you never will. You never get used to the feeling that your existence will soon cease to be.
But every time I die, he still stays –right there in the depths of my soul. Like an echo. It reverberates in my mind, the last moments, the memories. Like the beat of my hearts. And I know… I know he didn't want to go. Take it whichever way you like, but he didn't want to go. Not to forever death and not to me.
But sometimes we're not given a choice. There will be thirteen of me, but I'm still one person.
One in the same, never to change.
And I sauntered off.
vale decem roughly translates to "goodbye ten" from Latin to English. It's the name of the song that's played when Ten returns to his TARDIS and the Ood sing to him at the end of EoT.
As you can probably tell, Ten POV and then Eleven POV.
As you can probably tell, Ten POV and then Eleven POV.
© 2010 - 2024 vertigoevie
Comments10
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This really puts things into perspective. Nice job.